Specialising in the human experience of Living with prostate cancer – warts and all

My Fight: An old friend has a sad ending

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Arthur OliarisThe couple in this photo, Mary and Arthur Oliaris, were the owners of the “El Greco” coffee lounge in Balwyn back in the 1960’s.  Back then, hotels closed at 6 pm and did not provide any facilities for our younger people.    The local coffee lounge was the place to meet  friends and Mary and Arthur were accepted as friends and mentors to us all.

This photo was taken in the mid 1980’s when we held a reunion of all the ex-teenagers we could find after a hiatus of around 20 years.  That would be another 25 years to bring us up to date. (2011)

As I am 69 and these folk were older, Arthur would probably be approaching 80 years of age if he were still alive.

One of our teenage colleagues, Neil Morris, met Mary last year and was told the unfortunate story of Arthur’s passing.  Another victim of prostate disease, Arthur had reached an incontinence level where he had to be on top of the toiletry situation.  Out on an errand, he stopped off at a public toilet in a busy location, and subsequently suffered an attack of some kind.

Later in the night, an alert was put out as Arthur had been declared missing.  It was some 24 hours before help arrived but it was too late … he was already deceased.   Apparently, users of the facility assumed him to be just another drunk or substance abuser and simply stepped over him – not one of them was prepared to get involved and see if this old man/stranger needed any help.

Nobody deserves to be deserted on their death bed like Arthur was.  We still  remember him with a lot of respect.


Written by Greg Naylor

16 October 2011 at 5:06 pm

Posted in DEATH, Greg Naylor, incontinence, my fight

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