GREG'S LEGACY

Specialising in the human experience of Living with prostate cancer – warts and all

Greg’s Greatest Journey – 9 June 2008

with 5 comments


The family rallies around …

Over the last four weeks, the family have progressively visited us every weekend with the odd visit during the week. It has been the greatest opportunity to sit down with each one of them and discuss the state of play and to discuss thoughts and philosophies with them all. It was very revealing to us all but it has also been very wearing.

There are seven grandchildren ranging from one through fourteen years old. The oldest is the only one ready to sit down and discuss things with … and I fully intend to do that with him. I feel a bit cheated that I cannot do that with all the others.

They are all so different and I know I could offer relevant advice to each of them if only I had the chance. Consequently, I am hoping to be able to write a few words to each of them telling them how I feel about them and how I remembered them. It would be nice to think they would read it when they are ready.

I am really grateful that this cancer has left me physically and mentally intact for the time being giving me some time to work through all the issues associated with dying.

Apart from dealing with family, one has to challenge one’s spirituality to find out what one truly believes. You have to confront the concept of existence beyond death. You have to review your life searching for regrets … of which I have found bugger all and you have to work with your partner who has to come out of it in the one piece at the other end.

I thank my God for the love and caring of Pauline, my wife, and of our family and their kids.

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Written by Greg Naylor

9 June 2008 at 10:29 am

5 Responses

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  1. The finality of death certainly brings about this type of reflection. It’s often said that it would be good if we could share all of these important thoughts and beliefs before we were about to be separated permanently, but I wonder if we could really be so candid and more importantly whether those around us would be ready to listen?

    I’d encourage you to try to write some things for the grand kids, it may be years before they are ready to read it but they will be thankful for it when they are. In my own case I lost my maternal grandfather at twenty, but it hasn’t been until more recently that reading his memoir of his WWII service, and the lessons that he learnt about people through that, really resonated with me.

    Once again, thanks for including us in this journey Greg, it is certainly thought provoking and cause for reflection.

    Dave from Albury

    9 June 2008 at 11:25 am

  2. Being candid is no problem – the option is to die regretting that you held back and I’m not going there. My late father lived by the motto that, “the truth never hurt anyone”. His problem was that he too often used that as a weopon.

    The only problem I have is whether specific individuals are ready (or in the case of the kids – old enough) to listen. It seems I might be on the right track in leving the written word. Thanks Dave

    Greg Naylor

    9 June 2008 at 11:46 am

  3. Just being yourself might be enough too Greg. I lost my father 5 years ago after he too had suffered a long illness (for 20 years!) Before he became ill I didn’t enjoy a great relationship with him, but in his later years (as he realised he didn’t have long left) he mellowed a lot. He made no specific effort to explain himself, or the way he felt about me, but he didn’t have to because in the end it was just self evident.

    raydixon

    9 June 2008 at 2:48 pm

  4. I’m probably being a self-important old fart wanting to influence young minds from beyond the grave. However, if they don’t want to know, they will never follow through.

    Ray, when the chips are down, there is no room for pretense … there is only truth, acquired wisdom and being yourself.

    Greg Naylor

    9 June 2008 at 3:15 pm

  5. I wish someone would tell St Kilda FC that. They could do with facing a few home truths right now.

    raydixon

    9 June 2008 at 5:30 pm


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