Dear family and friends

So much has changed in my active life and my diet since being diagnosed with terminal cancer.

The primary hormone treatment (ADT) of itself knocks you around. Apart from the chemical castration I have already spoken of, it reduces your physical activity, slows your walking speed and robs you of any stamina. Just wheeling a barrow load of wood from the shed to the house is exhausting. As a result, I have had to give up work and basically spend my time doing bugger all.

It also has an effect on your cognitive powers, slowing thought processes preventing multi-task thinking all together.

But, more importantly, there is a high risk of developing osteoporosis (a loss of bone density allowing easily broken bones) and an attack on the immune system. The mohphine based pain killers also cause constipation.

Last week, the doctors changed my morphine based medication from MS Contin to Oxycontin in an effort to reduce some of the side effects of the previous medication.

Last Friday, I came across a news article about a scam supplying oxycontin to the recreational drug world and it led to this CNN page listing 27 news items about the misuse of Oxycontin. It explains that Oxycontin either crushed or dissolved in water gives an instant high – the prescribed method of use is by swallowing the tablet whole.

Some of those articles reveal that Oxycontin was one of the two drugs that police are trying to source in the death of Heath Ledger.

Then you read that Courtney Love overdosed on the same two narcotics as Heath Ledger. She referred to Oxycontin as ‘Hillbilly Heroin’. Toss in Winona Ryder’s misuse of the drug and country singer Mindy McCreedy’s fraudulent access to the substance, and my use as a simple pain management tool puts me up there on the “A” list of Oxycontin misusers.

So, with all this going on in my body, I have had to modify my diet to take in more fibre and am now on a regime of supplements to combat these side effects.

I am using lactoferrins plus bovine and shark cartilage as immune boosters, Psyllium husks to add fibre and to combat the constipation, calcium supplements to ward off the osteoporosis … and I am eating porridge for breakfast for the first time in my life. I do miss my bacon and eggs!

Regards
Greg

Dear family and friends

Living with cancer takes you through the full range of emotions. Whilst you can laugh at some aspects of it, the sad side of it is always with you. There is no relief from the reality of it all.

A couple of weeks ago, there was news of a new drug to extend the life of those with advanced prostate cancer and I volunteered to join clinical trials if they came my way (which is unlikely as the trials are scheduled for England and the USA).

These trials will provide two thirds of the participants with the new drug whilst the other third will be given a useless placebo. To qualify for the trial, the participants have to forego all other treatments currently being used.

That is one hell of a decision to have to make … take a 1 in 3 chance of going without any treatment so that the other 2 out of three get the chance to live another 12 months longer. I do not know if I have the guts to go for it.

As it stands, I have the chance of about 18 months remission if the PSA reading drops back to the normal range. After that, I can expect a constant deterioration until I lose the fight somewhere in the following year (+/- 6 months). No ifs or buts – that’s the way it is.

Recent developments don’t hold much promise either. They have trialed one form of chemotherapy that gives about half the patients an extra month of life but with major threats to the heart. Is it worth it? I don’t know.

Similarly, they have proven that another drug can slow down the inevitable osteoporosis of the hormone treatment but it does not prolong longevity or improve the quality of life. Is it worth it? You tell me.

Do not think of me as being negative here. Rather, I am explaining the reality of day to day life from the trenches … and there is nothing in the progression of the disease to be positive about.  You try not to let it get to you … but it does!  You hope for a miracle … but you prepare for the worst!  The only thing left is to try and get the most out of today.

Anyhow, the pain management becomes more finely tuned by the day and I actually got through a night without having to get up due to the pain / hot flushes.

This week, another donation of a trailer load of firewood turned up (thanks Wayne) along with a couple of meals of my favourite meal – lambs fry and bacon (thanks Shirley) and a bag of freshly picked King Valley oranges (thanks Murray).  That’s real country generosity and we appreciate it.

Regards
Greg

Dear family and friends

You may not think so, but there is a funny side to prostate cancer.

The indignities of rectal examinations, the cathetars, the feminisation of hormone therapy, the loss of libido, and impotence are just a few of the insidious outcomes of being diagnosed with advanced prostate cancer.

The fun begins when the doctor puts on the rubber glove and tells you to tuck your knees under your chin. They say that most men have trouble with this rectal invasion and the thought actually deters some of them from presenting to the doctors surgery in the first place. In my research I came across this attempt at humor to educate such men.

Then there are the hot flushes. It amuses me that, when I strip to the waist to cool down, some woman will say, “Now you know what menopause is all about!” … I have no concept of menopause … but I do have some idea about dying. When was the last time you saw a menopausal woman strip to the waist with a hot flush? Now, that would be amusing!

The little boobies look cute and the regression of the testes takes one back to ones childhood. These days, when they itch, I scratch my throat.

Finally, I came across this web article that indicates that penis size is reduced by 2.2 inches in men with advanced prostate cancer. So, I guess I will just have to settle for a normal sized penis like the rest of the guys. Sorry girls!

Back in the trenches, this week has been a mixed bag. I overdid it at the weekend spending Saturday afternoon with the Blogging boys and Sunday afternoon at the Whitfield footy club’s ‘big effort’ raffle. I found a new limitation.

I slept all day on Monday and came unstuck on Tuesday morning with the most intense pain breakthrough that I have experienced. Gee, that morphine liquid comes in handy sometimes.

Next Monday, I have a review of pain management with the Palliative Care physician and on Tuesday I get the second hormone implant at the local doctors – with that needle as thick as a kebab skewer – to help me along the way to remission.

Regards
Greg